Daughter and father complex issues can stem from an overbearing father, an absentee father or even from the mother. Yes, even from the mom.
Daddy issues or what is called the Electra syndrome, is a complex issue of a daughter competing with her mother for the attention of the father. As the child grows up, she eventually tends to look for male attention outside of the home front. When a girl is ultra flirtatious, sexually aggressive, wanting to catch men’s attention, then there is a very high chance that the girl has issues called the Electra complex.
Unrealized expectation or dream
Some issues result from the dad being very strict, constricting the freedom of the daughter, and imposing perfectionism. The daughter would either respond by living up to the father’s expectation and even actually living her father’s unfinished dreams; or rebel. There are fathers who wanted a son but ended up getting a daughter. This unrealized expectation or dream, when not properly managed, will cause the daughter to feel inferior and will try to compensate by living up to the role of a son. She will live the life of her father’s “son” and will soon find herself with no identity. This can cause the daughter to excel in school, appear very successful in her career, but unbeknownst to the outside world, she has poor self-image and is overstressed trying to live up to her father’s expectations.
The problem in this type of daughter and father complex issue can cause confusion and dilemma in establishing the daughter’s self-identity. At a certain point in her life, she will start to wonder why she is feeling “not herself” or “unsuccessful” in spite of excelling in everything that she does. Living up to other people’s expectations can be very straining on anybody and this is what happens to the daughter. Another offshoot to this is at a point when the daughter snaps and suddenly drops the ball. She might feel the weight too heavy to carry that she may opt to go against the will of the father and become self-destructive.
Some daughters with overpowering dads can choose to react aggressively even as a young girl and will never try to please her dad at all. In fact, she will go out of her way to show her displeasure for her dad’s micro-management. She will smoke, have low grades, and might resort to drugs and alcohol just to rebel and make her point. This produces the complete opposite of the perfectionist daughter.
Not worthy of a father’s love
Another daughter and father complex issue is derived from the lack of a father figure. It may be that the father is usually traveling, or worse, the father left them without a word. The latter condition leaves a very strong dent on the self-esteem of the daughter. The daughter can grow up with the thought that she is not worthy of a father’s love. Some may even think that they caused the parents’ break up and the father leaving them.
Low self-confidence and feeling of guilt
With low self-confidence and feeling of guilt, a daughter can grow up to be withdrawn and mediocre. The daughter’s yearning for a father’s affection, protection and guidance can cause deep melancholy and pain as the girl grows up. And some pent-up anger can be directed inwardly that affects the mental health of the daughter.
Absentee fathers to get into drugs
It is not uncommon for daughters with absentee fathers to get into drugs, go into depression and have multiple partners. Sadly, these problems are not very easy to show as the cause for the problematic life of the adult daughter. When a grown up daughter spirals downward with some drug or alcohol issues or multiple divorces, the root cause which goes all the way to her childhood may not be apparent even to the closest people to her. Many daughters suffering from this daughter and father complex issue may not even recognize the root cause of her failing life.
Touching her inappropriately
The worst daughter and father complex issue is if the daughter feels that the father is touching her inappropriately or lusts for her. These complex issues can cause not only stress, depression or anxiety but even neurosis. The girl can hate the father and hate herself for allowing such things to happen.
Father figure is very important
A father figure is very important to the health of a daughter’s emotional and psychological growth. The father’s presence can fill up a daughter’s most memorable moments. The father, being the first adult male encounter of any daughter, can spell the success or failure of the daughter’s future relationships with men.
Can devastate the future
Parents should recognize that daughter and father complex issues are real and can devastate the future of their daughter. They should work out a plan on raising their daughter properly.
Conclusion: A genuinely caring father who gives time and shows affection to his young daughter can provide an anchor so that her girl will not go astray; and keep on the right path towards success in different fronts of life, especially in marriage.